Let’s not Nano…

Yes, let’s not Nano at all.

So tomorrow is November 1st, and thus the beginning of Nano.  For the uninitiated, Nano is an online writing circle, which aims to push participants to write 50K in one month. With the best of intentions, I signed up, but you know what?  I’m not even going to try…

Let’s count the reasons:

1.  My brain is still broken.  I’ve been working on my WIP for FIVE FUCKING MONTHS and it’s still a piece of shit. Literally five months – the document was created 29 May, and I only have 52K words, and it’s 52K of meaningless, incoherent, unfinished drivel. I’m not even kidding.  Normally I would write about 50K a month, but I haven’t written anything else in this entire time and my budding career as a wannabe author is as good as over because, well… my brain is broken.

2.  We’re building a new house,  and mid-November we move into said new house.  I haven’t started packing yet…

3.  My son’s birthday is the same weekend we move.

3.1   My inlaws are staying for a week, possibly two, over the move period. Because it wasn’t stressful enough. Apparently.  So that’s half of November gone right there… this period will now be referred to as the Seventh Circle of Hades. 

4. I will have limited to no wifi for as long as Telstra decide to not reconnect it to the new house. Telstra are Australia’s biggest and most useless telco.  Too bad if you didn’t need to know that. Now you do. If anyone from Telstra is reading this and would like to lodge a complaint, please hold…  

5. I’ll be away for the weekend after the above mentioned move for my son’s tennis tournament. 

6. I have a general release on November 22 (Breaking Point) and have a 12-day blog tour.  Which bloody idiot volunteered me for that? Oh right. Yeah, that would me. 

7. I have another pre-release (Clarity of Lines) in the first week of December which I am also doing a blog tour for.   The fabulous Literary Nook is doing this one for me, because they are awesome. 

8.  My EDJ is killing me slowly.  To the point where the thought of going to work every damn day makes me sick to the stomach, but we need the money because of the aforementioned building of our new house. 

9.  I haven’t had more than three hours sleep a night since god-only-knows-when.  It’s affecting my memory and thought patterns, to the point where some days I can nod and communicate if the sentences are short and the words aren’t too long. Okay, so it’s not quite that bad, but some days if I leave the house with coffee and wearing pants I consider this a win.

10.  Did I tell you that my brain is broken?  Well it is. The good news is I no longer feel the urge to cry when I open my laptop anymore, and I can now manage writing a shopping list without making my eye twitch. The words are there, the characters in my head are still talking, but I seem to have lost the ability to write coherently. 

Soooo, as you can see, Nano is just NOT gonna happen.  And tbh, I’d be stupid to try.  I’m stressed enough.  At this rate, I doubt the entire month of December will happen either, and if anyone can put 2014 on hold, I’d be really grateful.  

At this point in time, I can’t see the third book in the Turning Point series happening either.  If it is ever published – and that’s a really big IF –it won’t be until late 2014.  Or maybe not at all.  I just truly don’t know.

Well, that’s all the excuses reasons I’ve got for being a Nano-fail.  

pity party 3


  • Donna

    I’m very sorry to hear about your broken brain. Even Wiggles character bandaids can’t fix broken brain. But FYI you’re completely wrong when you call yourself a budding wannabe author. I offer the following evidence to support my argument.
    1. Goodreads calls you an author. Goodreads could NEVER be wrong.
    2. Nearly all of your books have ratings averaging higher than 4 stars. Even the short stories which is rare.
    3. You’re one of my very favourite authors and I know that I have awesome opinions and I’m never wrong.
    So really that third point is all you need as proof.
    4. Despite your broken brain you wrote the best Nagron fanfic I’ve read.

    So there you have it. Broken brain and all you’re still definitely and Author (with a capital A).
    I hope your poor brain feels better soon 🙂

  • younela

    Hi NR, They sound like damn good reasons to me to put your entire life on hold. Having moved house in the last year I know that was STRESSFULL enough. Having a house built? WELL I don’t even want to imagine! Your brain isn’t broken it just needs a proper rest. An awesome writing talent like yours will be back. Just let life sort itself out first. Readers will be waiting. I hope you’re very happy in the new house. Wishing you all the very best.💐 Elayne ( from UK)

    Sent from my iPad Elayne😉


  • Tina Marie

    Honey, you are not broken. You are over-worked, underpaid and stressed out. Any one of the things stressing you out would cripple a lesser woman. You are expected to put up with moving and your in-laws at the same time? I would flee the country and just let them do it without me! No, really. You can’t expect your brain and body to go full speed ahead forever with no breaks. I don’t know how to be a writer. I do know that if I’m trying to do something and it is frustrating me to madness, I need to step away for a bit. Maybe don’t “try” to write for a day or two. Keep a notebook handy in case actual dialogue or prose presents itself to your frontal lobe, but take off the immediate pressure.

    And finally, I doubt that the 52K words which make up your current WIP are shit. Writers are notoriously harder on themselves than anyone else is. If you survive a move, your in-laws and a tennis weekend, you deserve a medal for bravery. Now stop calling your wonderful creation shit. It is an insult to one of my favorite authors!

  • Ginger

    You just need a big bottle of wine (or a few beers), a gallon of ice cream and a hug. You know what? As much as we devour books from our favorite authors and scream we want more we want more…we can be a patient bunch.
    You have a lot going on,so take a small break. Life happens and darn those pesky inlaws!

  • bevsutherland2306

    You need HUGS!! Lots and lots of HUGS!! If I was Oz, I would come and tell all those irritating people that are invading your life…Yes, in-laws (know all about them unfortunately) and readers/publishers, EVERYONE to p**s off and leave you alone!! You only need to look at your reviews on GR to know that you are the fave author of a helluva lot of readers myself included as you know, so PLEASE don’t be so hard on yourself, we’re mostly a patient lot…and those that aren’t can go hang!! You can only do so much at once, house moving is extremely stressful as it is, without all the added pressures that you’re facing at the mo…something’s gotta give…and I sincerely hope it isn’t you my lovely!!

  • pyejammies

    Don’t worry, Hon, your broken brain will mend in its own good time. Many authors take years to write one book so don’t stress yourself. You’ve given us so much already but you need to give yourself something now. YOur characters are talking to you so jsut chat back with them and eventually everything will fall into place and if it doesn’t? What the heck you and your family come first, those characters can just take a back seat. I hope the house move goes well. Just think how wonderful it is to have a house built for you and take time to enjoy it.
    Lots of HUGS.

  • J.R. Alluisi

    Sorry to hear about your broken brain. Dont give up on Your career as a writer. If you need ayear, or even two to get back to it, then take your time. your fan’s will be here when you are able to do it again. Look out for yourself and your family.

  • Elaine

    Yikes! Been there done that (without the writer part) and when your brain feel broken? Take a step back, take a deep breathe & know that we will be here for you when you are ready. You are a fabulous author with stories that will be waiting for us when you are ready! Also, why don’t you plan a weekend after all is done & run away from home for the weekend? Wishing you the best from Florida.

  • Laney E

    I usually make a point never to join ‘pity parties’ but yours is a valid reason and excuse to indulge in with as much wine (and other beverages) as desired.
    Sounds like a bad case of overworked, over-stretched, feeling under-appreciated…but you’re not alone. Now that you’ve shared this dilemma with your loyal fans/readers (and we are loyal!), please do what the unbroken part of your brain is telling you and TAKE A BREAK!! Really, no one expects you to be super-human although releasing series books back to back is pretty much bordering on that concept!

    We appreciate your honesty and we all agree (I am sure) that we’d prefer our favourite AUTHOR to be of sound mind and mended brain when nano-ing the talking characters to life again.;-))

    Take care
    Laney E K)

  • tdotwific

    Ok, lady, listen to me and listen well. I love your honesty. Now that you have admitted all these things to us and yourself, can we take the negativity out. That is what I see as being your turning point. You have already committed and accepted to yourself that you are NOT publishing, NOT writing, NOT sleeping and feeling that your brain is broken. But, guess what, this is the biggest lesson I have had to learn this year, go easy on yourself and YOU, wonderful, sweet, dedicated, smart, lovely, passionate and involved woman, You. Are. Allowed. To. Have. A. Break.
    Life happens, challenges appear. I know what you are facing is not your barriers and you will be so successful (whatever your definition of success is and how that looks to you or you hope it is). But also know, that I, me, little ol me will be here supporting you and cheering you on and I will be here when all the challenges are overcome so that you can be the you that I know you are proud of. That negative crap is just crap and I am being honest in saying you don’t need that repeating in your thoughts so stop it. You are great. You are some of the reasons I keep reading smut and starting reading m/m slash and am not ashamed of yelling it.
    I get you are trying to make light of all of this but I also know when you say it, some of you really really means it. So sure, no NANO, that is soooo fine and I think we all forgave you before you wrote this post. But I will not accept this pity party and being harsh to yourself. What I read was you are being a great parent, a great spouse, a great provider and being great in your personal commitments, passions and soul choices. You are so going to write that next story and even if it IS published in 2015, I will wait. Because that is what a great reader does for those they are a fan of. Please take a breath, live for each moment, remember why you are doing all these things and pay attention to the little things as those are the big things. You are building your future and going to your son’s tennis tournament, I wish my parents even cared like you do. That means, you are doing fine and everything will be great. You just have a really busy couple of months, nothing you can’t handle or else the universe would not be letting you face it.
    Ok, that is my rant over so big hugs, take a shot of your fav shot and laugh. That is what I do so I am sending it all your way. See you,


  • Barbara Moore

    NIC!!!! I promise its not going to be this crazy forever! Your doing great, your a very busy girl. I think you’ve done amazing in such a short amount of time. Those boys are gonna be rattling the cage wanting to be brought to life on your laptop as soon as you have time to sit and breath. I cannot believe all you do in a week, you really are super busy. Good luck with the internet and the move, eat some chocolate…well maybe a lot of chocolate, drink some wine and have a great freaking day. ly xo

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